Many people arrive at my office after recently going through a painful breakup. They want to know how to cope with a split with their boyfriend, spouse or even just their latest fling. Experiencing bad breakup depression, they wonder if there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
Currently, the marriage breakup statistics are around 67% so there is an epidemic of relationship problems. Endings can be tough, but they do not have to be devastating.
The pain you feel when you experience heartache is an old feeling. The painful emotions are not about the other person. Huh? You may be reading over the last sentence to be sure you heard me right. How could that be? The core foundation of that pain is something you originally felt a long time ago (probably as a child).
You tend to project your internal pain onto outer situations and make the experience the cause of the suffering. The ending of the relationship only brought up a deeper hurt you had felt earlier in life.
If you feel that you are constantly getting your heart broken, there could be a pattern in your subconscious that is creating the attraction and the demise of the relationships. Like being stuck in autopilot, you cannot break free of continuous heartache until you change your inner beliefs.
Deep feelings of unworthiness tend to attract people and situations that mirror those beliefs. The people you attract may have their own set of inner struggles which is why they are also initially attracted to you. The only way to change your dating destiny is to change your inner mind to feeling more lovable and worthy.
The most powerful way to change your deeper mind is through self-hypnosis. Myths of being under mind control with a man with a pocket watch are far from the truth. Hypnosis is simply a deep relaxation that sometimes involves visualization.
By putting your mind in a relaxed state or trance, you can write over the old messages of unworthiness with new ideas of self-love and personal power. You will be the same person, only without the negative voice in your head that puts you down all the time.
When you feel good about yourself naturally, you are more attractive. If you really believe on a deep level that you deserve real love, you will attract new, wonderful relationships into your life.
The old pain you felt when someone leaves can be healed through hypnosis as well. Since your subconscious does not know the difference between now and ten or twenty years ago, you can literally go back in time and resolve the suffering felt earlier in your childhood without years of therapy. You can instantly shift the past and step powerfully into the present.
Popular self-help books on the dating subject give tips on how to act confident, but they do not work because underneath you may still feel insecure. Even if you pretend to have it together when first dating someone, your true self will eventually show itself. To truly feel worthy on every level, you need to change it in your subconscious mind.
You have the power inside of you to attract the love you deserve. It doesn't matter what jean size you are, your education or your social status, you are unlimited to create the life you want by using the power of your mind.
Author Resource:-
Debra Berndt is a Certified Hypnotic Love Coach, Host of The Love Coach Radio Show, and Author of the upcoming book, "Let Love In." Get free attract love mp3 download and her weekly dating advice newsletter from her website at AttractLoveToday.com
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